Posted by: elizaadeolu | February 18, 2011

Encourage yourself (fairy godmothers don’t exist!)


I’m sorry if I just burst some people’s bubbles by revealing that fairy godmothers don’t exist. Well, I guess it’s better to know now than later. Don’t think all you have to do is shed tears and she appears to tell you she would make it all right with a swish of her magic wand.

Seriously, there are times when you just break down and the fairy godmother would really have come in handy if she existed. Suffice it to say that still not being able to secure the job I wanted at this stage is not what I bargained for. Some of those I sent my CV in an email to did not even bother to reply. That can be frustrating, but so can working in a place you don’t like; sitting in a class and not understanding anything, but praying fervently that the lecture time is over; wondering what exactly you would do at the end of the school year, and on and on.

And that is when you get sad and maybe shed some tears (if you’re not the macho person with the no-tears syndrome). Many people have shoulders to cry on: friends and family. But for some others it is a case of Me, Myself and I; and even for those who get others’ shoulders wet (literally), at the end of the day, all you’ve got is yourself (well, except if you claim their bed-space too).

What is the way forward then? Self encouragement.

I attended two seminars organised by the careers services some weeks ago. One of them was on being a creative writer and the other was on being an entrepreneur. Interestingly, the recurring themes at these seminars were persistence and self encouragement. Somehow, I believe these themes are symbiotic in a sense. Self encouragement leads to persistence and you persist because you encourage yourself (with or without the encouragement of others).

You can do this (flexing your muscles and all)

No one knows you better than yourself. No one knows how it really hurts you; even those who have been in your shoes might not have had your peculiar experience. Many times, others console us with the fact that we were not cut out for something, when we know deep within ourselves that that is what we want.

So, if you feel frustrated that things are not working out the way you planned, don’t give up (and don’t wait for the fairy godmother). You don’t necessarily need others to encourage you. You can do that yourself. My people have a proverb that would if translated mean that the Lizard that falls off an Iroko tree without dying would clap for itself if no one else does, and go for it again (I hope you are big on proverbs).

What this means is to keep keeping on, even if everyone else deserts you or feel you won’t make it. Pick yourself up and say, “I’ll try again and again and again…” until something gives and I make it. Sounds cliché? It’s, however, the truth, the well-worn truth.


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